FREE: Unique bracelet

The listing, Unique bracelet has ended.

Holy crap, y'all! Impress your friends and intimidate your enemies with this incredible bracelet made from real surgical tubing!

This bracelet is made out of genuine surgical tubing. Don't ask where I got this much surgical
tubing. Suffice it to say, my attorney said it was the first time she had ever heard of an
insanity defense being successfully used in a misdemeanor hearing. I'm never allowed to volunteer
at the hospital ever again, so this is a unique item.

This hand-woven body adornment has many uses:

you can tell your friends that it is the remains of your beloved pet jellyfish.

You can raise awareness for atheists' rights!

You can pretend that it is 1987, and you have the coolest Jelly Bracelet in your whole middle school!

You can pretend that I am your friend, and that I made this bracelet just for you! But your friend needs money! Won't you please send me a blank check made out to your friend "CASH"?

Unlike those cheesy "Paracord Bracelets", this will never come apart on your camping trip!

You cannot use it for fishing, rappelling, stringing an improvised bow, tying tourniquets,
or as an emergency snorkel. When you perish from starvation, falling, arterial bleeding,
or drowning, the rangers will be able to identify your badger-nibbled remains from the fact
that this unique item is still on your skeletal wrist. What fun!

Free shipping in the US! Be the first kid on your block to wear something this bizarre!