Ralphie as Adult: Round One was over. heh heh. Parents one, kids, zip. I can feel the Christmas noose beginning to tighten. Maybe, what happened next, was inevitable. Mother: Ralphie, what would you like for Christmas? Ralphie as Adult: Horrified, I heard myself blurt it out! Ralphie as Adult: I want a Red Ryder carbine action two-hundred shot range model air rifle. Oooooooh! Mother: No, you'll shoot your eye out. Ralphie as Adult: Oh no! It was a classic, mother BB-gun block. "You'll shoot your eye out!" That deadly phrase honored many times by hundreds of mothers was not surmountable by any means known to Kid-dom, but such as my mania, my desire for a Red Ryder carbine, that I immediately began to rebuild the dike.